Crazy Hair

I've been experimenting with new hair styles this week. Nothing too wild and crazy, no cutting of the hair, just pinning it up a different way. Eh. So far so good, I guess. Change is good, right?? My hair is shoulder length and curly, and I can't stand having it hanging in my face. I like my hair for the most part, but what I was thinking of this morning is the fact that I even have to "deal with" curly hair.

My whole entire life I had stick straight hair. At one point it was all one length, down to my waist. Very pretty! But when Fran got sick the first time and she lost her hair thanks to chemo I shaved my head as a show of sisterhood. Actually, I let my brother shave my head and to this day I feel he got just a little TOO much enjoyment out of the experience. My point is when my hair grew back it came in curly. Wth??? ME with CURLY hair?? What alternate universe is this??

So I learned to style curly hair. I buy curly hair/volumizing products and most of the time either clip it out of my face or throw it into a ponytail. My point is they always say girls with straight hair want curly and girls with curly hair want straight. I'm here to tell you IT DOESN'T MATTER. I had bad hair days when I had straight hair and I still have bad hair days with curly hair.

So...<>...be happy with what you've got! Because, curly or straight, everyone has bad hair days! And I can vouch for this!

Inspired by Robin

Well, here we are again....October. Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Ever since Fran first got sick Breast Cancer Awareness has became my "thing". I've helped raise money, I have several pink ribbon shirts and jewelry items, I buy things because they promise to donate a portion of my purchase to the Susan G. Komen Foundation. I get it. I'm there. And I'm all for helping women get passed feeling embarrassed and start feeling themselves up (because, let's face it ladies, YOU are the person who knows your girls the best!) and get those lumps looked at and get those boobs flattened into pancakes during mammograms. The more we raise awareness the more future generations will stay on top of it, catch it early, and do what it takes to beat this horrible, horrible disease.

But.....MY friend did all that. She found the lump, she did the chemo, she got the mastectomy, she did it ALL. And she died ANYWAY. All the pink in the world didn't save MY friend. So now that we find ourselves once again in October, Breast Cancer Awareness Month, and I see pink everywhere I can't help it that apparently the next step in my grieving process is bitterness.

Vacation's Over

So far what's the best part of being back from vacation? Why, regaling people with tales of our exploits of course! There's nothing quite like trapping an unsuspecting friend or family member for an hour or more telling them every little detail of your getaway. Nothing says "I missed you" more than rubbing it in how much fun you had while you were either 1.) away from that person or 2.) while they were stuck at home stuck in their day to day life. My favorite part is that exact moment when you can tell they've mentally checked out of the conversation. The dropping eyes, the slack jaw, the drooling. Priceless. That's when I know I've really done my job. I usually choose that moment to break out the souvenir I bought them (usually a shot glass they won't use or a t-shirt they won't wear) that way I can reel their attention back in for a few precious minutes before I lose them for good. Eventually I want to incorporate in some sort of 6 hour slide show/video presentation/photo album with either a pop quiz at the end or electric shocks during so my (prisoners) audience is forced to pay attention. I think I'll get to work on that for next time.....

It's hot.

Ahhhh...what a lovely day! It's a balmy 92 degrees. Not bad for the middle of summ-....wait. <> What the....? May 10th??!! It's too friggin' HOT for May 10th!!! I gotta tell ya, this does not bode well for what may be coming when summer actually gets here. If it was 92 and it was the middle of June I would turn the air on. But I REFUSE to turn my air on on May 10. F- you Mother Nature! I would rather sit here uncomfortably soaking in my own body sweat and surrounded by the stench of B.O. than give in to you and your mood swings! Just because I have kids dropping like flies all around me, and actual flies drawn to me thanks to my pit sweat does not mean you will win again! I have windows. I have fans. And I have to work at 6:00. Which means there is air conditioning in my future. Just NOT at MY house. So there!

I have had such a bad headache today. Then I took the kids to Walmart.....and that made it even worse. I find myself surprising optimistic whenever I take the kids to Walmart. I tend to forget how annoying and stressful it was the last time I took them.

Bra shopping

Walmart mirrors make me look like shit. And I am convinced they do this on purpose. As of yet, I can find no reason WHY they would do this. But I'm sure it has something to do with a corporate-greed-perverted-sense-of-humor thing. It's not just me either, it's you too. I'm sorry to be the barer of that bad news, but I refuse to think it's just me. There's is NO WAY that every time I leave the house to go try something on in the Walmart dressing room that I look that shitty. There's just no way.

Which brings me to my 2nd point. I have discovered the 7th circle of hell. No, it's not the mirrors that make me look hideous, it's what I was in the dressing room for in the first place. Bra shopping. Is there anything worse??? Actually, a few weeks ago I thought jeans shopping was the worst and the time before that I thought it was swimsuit shopping (which I'm sure has it's own seperate section of hell). But bra shopping has bumped both of those out of the top spot.

In order to find a bra that fits I have to first ackowledge that I am too fat around with too small of boobs to account for being too fat around. Go ahead and <> all you want, but according to bra makers this is the gospel truth. So I was on the hunt for a bra that is big enough around, with the right cup size, with padding, support and comfort, and that still looks pretty enough for me to want to disrob in front of my husband. This bra does not exist. So I did the best with what was available. Which means I got an ill-fitting, no padding, uncomfortable underwire, dorky looking boob sling and I paid too much for it. Just kidding. But I did get 2 bras, same brand but different styles in 2 different sizes. Explain that one to me. And I thought the Walmart mirror makers were the ones with the sick sense of humor.

Glasses

I wear glasses full time. Most of you know this already. I tried contacts in high school, but once I switched back to glasses I never went to contacts again. Here's the deal-- I can't see shit without my glasses. We have an Arthur (a PBS cartoon character) book where D.W. wants to get glasses (mainly for cosmetic reasons as far as I can tell), but Arthur actually needs glasses to see. In the book he tries telling D.W. this and explaining that before he got glasses a log looked like a dog, some trash looked like some cash, and some string looked like a ring. That's me. And I had an experience like this last night.

Jackson woke up while it was still dark out. Once I got him back to bed I was crawling back into my bed half asleep and there was a blanket on the floor by my bed. Without my glasses on it looked like my dog was laying on the floor, but I wasn't sure. So in my half asleep state I thought stepping on the blanket was a good way to determine whether or not this was my dog. WHY did this seem like a good plan?? If it would've been her I would've been STEPPING ON HER for no apparent reason other than to just determine whether or not she was there!

And I will admit that this happened after I just got done telling my kid to go back to sleep because it was the middle of the night. When actually it was 7:00 am. Oops.